Life's calling

Continueing from my previous sharing, guess what, I received the hard copy of the contract Langdon on that monday, but then because I was super busy on monday and tuesday, I couldnt get the chance to fill it and send it back. On wednesday, I sent my apology to the HR manager, telling her that I will get the form filled on that day. BUT then, on the afternoon, I got a phone call from the agent  to go for the interview on thursday at DTS( the job that I have been waiting for 5 wks).  I felt so so so distress, when I have already decided that I will go with Langdon, then suddenly the company that I wanted to go to called me. But on the other side, I am glad that I didnot sign the contract earlier because if that's the case, I would have to reject the interview already. I went to the interview today, it was okay, and waiting on the result ( i hope I would get it today or latest tomorrow), so I can decide where I should go. sigh... Life is full of surprises , huh. However,I am not worried at all, because.... there's something else that I found in my life, and that is the contentment inside me, filling the gap inside me, something that I have been searching all this while.

All this while, I have been quenching my soul through different ways : looking for a partner, volunteering in church, in temple, focusing on earning more money. but all those thing doesnot make me feel contented. Even when I have a partner, yes I do feel happy, but at times, there's an emptiness in me, and when I broke up with my ex, I was so devastated and the emptiness was even worse. I guess I can say that I have found my life's calling. I believe that everyone has different life purpose in this earth. Why would God bother to create us if we just live in this world, eat, grow, old and die? There must be something that is more to that. To some people, their life calling can be found in their passion, undoubtly, that applies to me as well. For the past 20 years, I live in this world without knowing what my ambition is. Majority of my friends have already known who they want to be : doctor, engineer, etc, while for me, I have been questioning that. Even up till now after I have finished my degree, I still dont feel content because I do not feel that this is what I want. I feel that my life is not complete yet. Thus, I asked my pastor how to always feel contented. He told me a very random answer : sometimes we need to realise that we live in this world not alone, there are so many people around us who need our help. You may able to feel content when you help those who are in need. At that time I really dont know how to respond to the statement, yet I did as what he said. I went online and browse through the volunteering opportunities available. I  came across a website where it says that Western Health Hospital needs volunteers. At that moment, I could feel strong desire to get that opportunity, I could feel the "click", I could feel that this is what I want. In the past, I have ever thought of studying medicine, but because my brain is not smart enough, I could not get into medicine (plus it's so costly).  I have also thought of studying nursing, but I didnot get the chance to study that because my mom would not allow me to take it. At that moment I just gave up my passion ( I guess because I was still unsure about myself). However, now that I look back, 99% of the elective subjects that I took at uni were all health subjects. That is why I feel so excited when I found this opportunity even though I know that I will not be a doctor or nurse when I do this volunteering job. However, one thing I can be sure of is that I will be a heart healer for those who are in the emergency unit. A lot of people will be worried about their condition, some may feel lonely, some may feel stress, and I know this opportunity will allow me to share the love of God, to allow myself to heal their heart or their disappointment. Whatever it is, I am willing to serve there, even if I just make a cup of coffee or tea to the patient or the patient's family. Trully I have never felt so happy in something that I do before, even when I was applying for this opportunity, I was so excited till I keep on contacting the person to ask for interview time. Now I know what I want to do in the future, and where my life is heading. Thank God that He answers my prayers, quenches my thirst, and He comforts me. If any of you feel that you are lost in this world, do not be worried or anxious about it, but in everything, pray in petition and give thanks to God, and God will transcend your understanding and give you peace (Phil 4:6-7)

Guess what, this morning I just got a revelation as well. A pastor named Ahiong came to our church to bless us. He is a pastor and also a prophet. He prophesied me, he told me that he saw bakpao (omg, so funny, I thought that maybe the pastor was hungry so that is why he sees that picture. lol). He told me the meaning of the picture is that I have the passion to bless the poor (which is so true -> I dont have the intention to show off, hehe). He said that I will be someone who organizes the money from different sources and give it to the poor (to emphasize,he said I will not be a rich person, ahahahha.. the money will come from different people, a bit sad to hear, but it's true anyway, I do not have any passion at all to enrich my bank account). Trully I can feel that my passion is inline with God's desire and I am very grateful that God reveals this to me cos it gives me strength and motivation to do even more to those who are poor and needy. At the moment, I am starting from small things that I can do, still very unsure about how I can do bigger things like organizing people's money, hahahah, but I will pray harder that God will show me what I need to do. Please do pray for me and support me in this okay? =)

All glory to God

Orange girl ^^


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