It's all about Him

Im supposed to sleep at this time, but im still here, blogging, cos i just cant jeopardize the fact that i might miss some of the details if i write this on some other day.

Today I met a stranger. I had a bible study at 7pm and supposed to meet my friends at 6.30pm. When I was rushing to get to the tram stop, a 50year old guy approached me. He told me that he lost his wallet and he couldnt go back to Queensland (he told me the name of the country side which i have no idea how to explain it). At first I would have thought that he is just another beggar who always randomly asks money from people. But he was different, I can feel it somehow. Even though he didnot show it in his face that he's in need of money but dunno why I was still standing and talking to him. I kept asking him to ask help from police station. he told me that the police gave him a local tram/train ticket and those tickets couldnt get him to queensland. Then my brain started to work, I remember that the smallest amount of notes that I had in my wallet was $20, and so... I was thinking, should I gave him that (normally I only give $1 or $2 to beggar). In the end i told him that he can have my $20 and that's all i can give. but the guy insisted that he has been trying so hard to get people to help him but people just laugh at him and would not help him. I asked him how much he needs and he told me $46.50. well, that was a lot of money, I would not think twice to not give it to a stranger. But somehow there is a voice inside me, straight  away telling me this Matthew 25: ³⁵ For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in (honestly, I dont remember the whole verse, but the voice just told me, "welcome strangers"). at that moment, i just know that it's from God and I had to obey. honestly, it's so hard for me to do this, because $50 means a lot to me cos im trying to save and i really count every single dollar that i spent. Even when my sister keeps on nagging me to buy her Danbo which costs $50, i straight way said "no". It was really a step of faith for me. deep inside I had so much doubts. I was afraid of : what if he's just trying to chisel some money out of me? I earn that $50 from my whole evening of work in the restaurant, so you would imagine how big that $50 for me, plus it's for someone that i dont know. 

But again, I think about it again, what if I am the one who is in his situation? further, when that voice came into my heart, I dont think twice, i straight away gave him that $50 even though there were doubts in my mind. What i need to admit is that I feel proud of myself after i did that because I did good deeds. However, later tonight, ko Bp shared the sharing about the Lord's supper and that verse that  mentioned above was in his sharing. He concluded his sharing with a question : What do we have to do to share the bread of life? 

the answer to that lies in Luke 13 : Now before the feast of the Passover, Jesus, knowing that his time had come that he would depart from this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. After supper, the devil having already put into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, to betray him, Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he came forth from God, and was going to God, arose from supper, and laid aside his outer garments. He took a towel, and wrapped a towel around his waist. Then he poured water into the basin, and began to wash the disciples' feet, and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. 

there are 3 elements that we need to have in feeding the world with the bread of life. They are : 

1. forgiveness. from this story, we know that Jesus knew Judas was going to betray him, yet he has forgiven him. This is shown where he still chose to wash judas' feet. 

2. humbleness. Jesus is the son of God, and He knows that He is the son of God. Yet he stoop himself to wash his disciples feet. Just imagine you wash your maid's feet, can you imagine that? yet, the lord of Lords, and the king of Kings serves us. 

3.Do it for God. "knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he came forth from God, and was going to God", we need to realise that whatever things that we do, we dedicate them to God, not to ourselves or to people. This really strikes me because it makes me realise that I should not take credit of what i did to the stranger, because what matters is not me, but God. I am just the vessel that God uses to help the stranger. Even the money that I have, it completely belongs to God. 

Another realisation that i obtained was that the act that I did to the stranger, it wasnot an act of doing good deeds, but it is something that I must do, because God commands it, because it is out of our love to God, because we know that God will be happy if we do it. Of all the things that God has done in my life, why couldnt I use my small amount of money to give Him glory? I cringe with shame even thinking about my sinful thoughts earlier. It's not about me, but it's all about Him.

Seriously even though I need to sacrifice my money in this case, I receive joy more than anything else. the joy is because God uses me, because God spoke to me, and because I can bless others.

All glory to God

Orange girl ^^